|And you thought I was kidding. This is only one side of the basement storage.|
|No one wants to get flocked on their 50th.|
First, I started my research. I figured if I was gonna spend significant money on one of those things, most of which are ridiculously over-priced, I wanted a decent one--no flimsy metal drawers that won't open or get off-kilter easily, no easily scratched paint, etc. Plus if he griped about the money, I could always tell him I'd only spent $10 for each year of his life. I eventually found a unit made by Homak that I really liked and in the price range I wanted to pay, but no one here in town carried it in stock. Shipping one directly to my house cost a minimum of $100, just for regular shipping. Expedited shipping was three times that. Naturally. I was willing to drive to Atlanta to pick up one of the chests, but no one there had it in stock either and ordering it would take 1-2 weeks I didn't have. I know I should have ordered sooner, but got distracted by my mom's funeral and waited to long to take care of it.
Since I wasn't going to be able to order it in time, I started looking at other brands and ultimately found something similar here in town at Harbor Freight Tools, though it was bright red instead of the pretty blue of the other unit I'd found. Still, I didn't figure the hubs would care; he is a guy, after all. Best of all, the unit I liked best was $200 off! Yay for me!! It was enough cheaper that I was even able to get another add-on drawer unit and pay for both for less than the one would have been originally with tax. Needless to say, I was rather pleased with myself--till we tried to load the mother into my van.
|Big-boy Toy Chest|
In real life, what happened is this: I pulled my van around back of the tool shop and opened the hatch. It occurred to me that I should probably have taken out one or two of my seats before going shopping (which of course I didn't), so I released one of the back seats and piled it on top of its neighboring seat. Piece of cake. The tool chest should slide right on in. Have I mentioned I lack spatial skills?? One guy comes out with the thing in a CRATE on a forklift. I took one look at it and thought to myself: "This does not bode well." The guy lowered it to the ground and proceeded to dismantle the crate. He then had to remove the unit from its box because there was no way it was going to get in the back of my van with all the cardboard and stryrofoam surrounding it. Next, Dude #1 calls to Dude #2 to help him lift the thing into the back of my van. Dude #1 gets back onto the forklift and hoists the chest (which weighs close to 300 lbs) up into the air, the idea being to try to get it as close to my car as possible. After some tricky maneuvering to get it close without ripping my back door off, the two dudes push and pull and grunt till the front end is in my van. Dude #2 then climbs over one of the middle seats (which I have folded down for him--where's a freaking Stow n Go when you need one?) so that he can pull the unit from the front while Dude #1 pushes from the back. This proved to be an even bigger challenge than first anticipated because the attached casters kept getting hung on one tine of the forklift.
Eventually the guys managed to clear the forklift, only to discover that they couldn't shove the chest up and over the last few inches of my car because the bumper angled the chest up enough that it got stuck on the ceiling. Lovely. I offered to shut the door with bungee cords since I didn't have far to go, till Dude #2 pointed out that if I hit any bumps the corner of the chest might shatter my back window. This was not helpful news. So the guys climbed out of my car and pulled the chest back out. I told them I could go home, deposit my seats, and come back, but by this point I think they were just determined to get me loaded up and out of their hair, or at least Dude #1 was. Dude #2 was much friendlier; he even told me he "wanted to come home with me" when he saw the lovely gift I was bringing home to someone. Shoulda told him it was for me...wouldn't that have dropped his jaw?? Instead I told him that if he came home to help me unload this beast, I'd make him any dinner he wanted. He liked the idea of a home-cooked meal (students are all the same), and we jokingly discussed menus.
|That forklift driver was the BOMB.|
Just minutes after I got home the hubs pulled up. I acquainted him with my glorious vision of how this was all supposed to go, then informed him that he had to help get the chest out of my car. I went next door to try to borrow my neighbor's muscles, but he wasn't home yet, so the hubs and I tried to unload the units ourselves. He managed to remove the box single-handedly, then got in the van to shift the main unit out while I braced it from behind. All in all, things went much more smoothly than I might have expected, and we were able to tip out the chest and slide it to the ground, after which I braced the wheels so we could flip it upright. A few minor scratches from the driveway and dings to the back courtesy of the Dudes later, and the hubs had his birthday present. A man of few words, still he salivated with glee at the thought of filling all the little drawers with his tools. Nerd. I told him we had to clean out the garage first, though, so there would be a place to put it, to which he happily agreed. I planned to spend Friday cleaning the garage, with which he could help when he got home, so he could spend all of his birthday playing with his new toy.
Instead, I woke Friday with cramping pain in my lower right abdomen. After spending some quality time with the bathroom, I assumed the pain would recede--but it didn't. I started to wonder if I'd regrown my appendix. I spent the entire day walking hunched over just like I did after my surgery and googling things like "What does a hernia feel like" and "gall bladder attacks" and "kidney stones." As if that weren't enough, my sinuses started kicking into gear, finally deciding that two weeks in a holding pattern was boring and they need to get on with torturing me. Not surprisingly, I didn't do squat in the garage.
When the hubs got home we did go out and work on cleaning it out, and by "we" I mean that "I" opened my van's sliding door and sat on the floor cleaning dust and scum off of stuff that's been sitting in the garage for 2 years while the hubs moved stuff around. Moving, albeit slowly, seemed to help a little, but it was still a rather uncomfortable few hours out in the hot garage.
Saturday morning, I showed the hubs this video to brighten his birthday morning:
Then I wished him a "Happy Uterus Liberation Day."
After lunch, the hubs went off to his
FMD came in and examined my abdomen, asking all the sorts of questions one might ask if they thought you were having kidney issues, all of which I was able to answer in the negative. After digging around and palpitating the tissue, he decided that if I did indeed have a hernia like the surgeon said after my appendectomy, it was still very small and more importantly wasn't strangulated. I was relieved to know I hadn't blown it out shifting the hub's birthday present. He told me he thought I'd probably just torn a few muscle fibers around the baby hernia, and they just stiffened overnight which is why they didn't hurt or feel pulled when we were unloading the tool chest, then he told me not to lift anything for a few days. FMD then had a look at my ears and throat, and while my sinusitis was not yet very advanced, he did say that I had fluid in one hear and my throat was starting to look funny, so I "definitely have something brewing." Then he gave me a prescription for some antibiotics to knock it out before I even have a chance to lose my voice. I love this man. He gave me something I've never used before, called "Omniflex," which just sounds like it ought to be a brand of workout machine at the local gym. I like it, though. My nose was running like a faucet all day Saturday, and after only one pill, the drainage stopped dead in its tracks. Can't beat that!
|"Omniflex--Give Your Germs a Work-Out!"|
|The ladders are well-hung.|
|Telescopes and extension cords always go together, no?|
|The birthday present in its new home.|
|Yeah, I know...cake decorating fail.|
|Playing in his drawers|
Happy Half-Century, Honey.